Invisible Re-Write
by Monochrome Princess
Summary: This is a re-write of my story Invisible. Maka is fed up with life and trying to conform to the voices in her head's idea of perfection. Deciding that Soul would be fine with his new girlfriend, Maka decides to end it all while her weapon is way. Warning Character Death.


**Anime: Soul Eater**

**Song: Invisible by Skylar Grey**

**Author's Note: This is a redo of my original story invisible. After reading it again I decided I disliked the quality of the piece but still wanted to keep the general idea of the story. So please enjoy this redo and tell me whether you enjoyed it more or less than the original. All criticism is accepted and appreciated. Although this piece that you are about to read is not what I want it to be I think this is the best way to write this story. Who knows maybe in five years I will redo it again. Anyway thank you for reading. I love you all and I shall be redoing a lot of my stories so please make sure to leave new reviews.**

_**Monochrome Princess **_

* * *

_**I take these pills to make me thin**_

_**I dye my hair, and cut my skin**_

_**I try everything, to make them see me**_

_**But all they see, is someone that's not me**_

* * *

How come when you stare out the window on clear nights when you can see each little detail of every star etched in the sky do you feel so at peace? My emerald shaded eyes focused on the world that danced outside of my bedroom window. I could still feel it the blood finding its way onto my bed as it dripped of my arm. It was pretty like a small red creek that ran through pale mountain rocks. I sighed and gathered the bandages from their spot on the small nightstand next to my bed. I began to wrap the cuts, laughing as the white gauze erased each one. It was funny to think that their was a time when there were no scars on my arm…

I gazed over at the clock ticking silently on the wall facing me and finally realized how late it had actually gotten to be. I tucked myself under the somewhat blood stained comforter and closed my eyes. I breathed in and out slowly trying to erase the emotions I was feeling. I should have buried the knife deeper, I deserved to bleed more than this. I mean if I was really trying then I wouldn't be so afraid to let myself cut. But then there is Soul to think of. Oh lovely Soul. The reason my life has continued on even though it wanted to be set free into a colorful sunset flying on a cool breeze.

I took another breath. If I wasn't asleep soon I would be to tired in the morning and Soul would notice something was off. I mean there had been several occasions where he has almost caught me. Sometimes he would catch me taking my diet pills, thankfully he wasn't very curious and believed my lie that they were just some vitamins. Or other times after I had drawn more cuts onto my arm with the silver knife I kept hidden away under my bed, he would grab my wrist instead off my hand to pull me along… It hurt the light pressure of his grip, but I bared with it not wanting to reveal my secrets.

The secrets I had been hiding in the darkest, most decayed part of my soul for the last few years. Hidden away with all the insults and comments that fueled me into changing into the thing I am not.

Outside the only thing I bet anyone sees is as Soul put it just yesterday afternoon a 'flat chested book worm'. A girl who was childish because of her lack of breasts and her pigtails that she wore each and every day. A girl who is stuck up because she had to be the best of her class, and does nothing but study and hit her partner or friends with hard covered books. A girl who is pathetic and has to rely on her partner to carry her through everything… the partner like stated before she did not deserve.

However unlike in middle school where she had gone through the trouble of trying to dye her hair different colors and act in more 'normal ways, she didn't care as much anymore. The academy students would find it strange the sudden changes to wardrobe and hair. Soul especially would become suspicious and find it strange that she had a sudden interest in changing herself. Although these 'sudden' interest in changing were not so recent but had been there for years. She was just too much of a coward to try and remake herself into someone her tormentor's would find acceptable.

Sleep began to tug at my eyes and I could feel my consciousness begin to fade away into an abyss of black where my dreams would be plagued by the voices. The ones the snickered and moaned at my pain… the ones I heard everyday of my life replaying inside of my head. Whether reading a book or speaking with Soul they were there whispering… waiting to send me over the edge.

* * *

_**Even when I'm walking on a wire**_

_**Even when I set myself on fire**_

_**Why do I always feel invisible, invisible**_

_**Everyday I try to look my best**_

_**Even though inside I'm such a mess**_

_**Why do I always feel invisible, invisible**_

* * *

I knew something was wrong for a while now, but I didn't know how to confront her about it. Sometimes, even though I think she has me fooled, Maka yelps or jumps in pain when I grab her arms or close to her wrist. She's been not eating enough and was taking the pills she claimed to be 'vitamins'. However he prefered to believe their was no problem. Because really if there was they were close enough that she could tell him anything.

I felt her presence and turned around and watched her drowsily enter the kitchen. On normal days she woke up first and made eggs and bacon and such. On normal days she wouldn't be eating just two slices of toast and a bowl of cereal for breakfast. On normal days she was more talkative and her wavelength had no shield to keep her thoughts or feelings protected from him. Normal days were not like days like this.

"What's up Maka?" I asked her in my normal nonchalant tone, trying to mask my worry.

"Nothing much Soul… How is Mika doing?" She asked in a somewhat whispered voice. Mika was my girlfriend. Now that I thought about it I had a date with her tonight.

"She is doing good. We have another date tonight. Honestly she is the best girl I have ever gone out with… That reminds me we will probably be out late so don't worry about waiting up for me." I told her.

"Okay if that's what you want." She said back. Damn it there was no difference in her voice just the same monotone voice she had been using quite frequently.

"You know Black Star and Kid and everyone are planning to go with us… you could come to if you'd like." She needed to get out and be with our friends. Its been such a long time since she has left the apartment for anything but school.

"Don't want to. I have to study a lot tonight…" She trailed off watching the waterfall of milk pouring into her cereal.

"What is wrong with you." I couldn't stand it anymore, I snapped. "Everyone wants you to come hang out with us like you used to! I mean you always wanted to go. Dressing up and going to the bar with everyone. What happened to the Maka who actually enjoyed social interaction?!"

"..." Maka mumbled something incoherent as she pushed the flakes of cereal around the bowl.

"What was that?" I asked in a somewhat calmer tone, knowing that I probably should not have lost it like that.

"I said it's just not something I really like to do anymore… I mean sure it was fun when we were younger but I mean now it just feels like a waste of time." She replied and ate a spoonful of cereal.

"Whatever if you wanna stay home fine. I'm leaving, see you later!" I said and walked out of the door.

* * *

I watched as Soul left our apartment and when I was sure he was gone I broke down into tears. Dressing up and smiling was just me trying to fit in when I was younger. Still trying to please the voices that never seem to shut up.

I was there with them, but I wasn't. My shell was. The thing that I was able to make look presentable and decent unlike the mess that dwelled within.

* * *

_**Here inside, my quiet hell**_

_**You cannot hear, my cries for help**_

_**I try everything, to make them see me**_

_**But everyone, sees what I can't be**_

* * *

After I ate about half of my cereal and a bite of toast I retreated back to my room. I grabbed the knife and viciously started to cut my arms and legs enjoying each and every little sting it brought.

"God damn it!" I screamed my voice echoing of my walls. No one else could hear me. I was trapped in this personal hell my mind hand created in order to drive my self into insanity…. into their so called perfection. I was tired off the voices. Tired of lying to Soul. Tired in general.

_It was time to end it all._

* * *

_**Even when I'm walking on a wire**_

_**Even when I set myself on fire**_

_**Why do I always feel invisible, invisible**_

_**Everyday I try to look my best**_

_**Even though inside I'm such a mess**_

_**Why do I always feel invisible, invisible**_

* * *

I felt like shit about leaving Maka alone. I know there was something wrong with her yet I choose to yell at her and leave her anyway. I must have been the worst weapon, no scratch that, best friend in the world.

"Soul if you want we can all go hang out at your place. Maybe Maka would come out to be with us then and she wouldn't be alone and you wouldn't feel so bad." Mika said trying to cheer me up.

I had told everyone about Maka and my little argument before I had left the house to be with them. We had planned to spend the whole day together, but I had ruined it.

"Yeah Soul come on! Watching movies at your place does sound better than wandering around the city and spending the night at a bar." Tsubaki chimed in.

"Then lets go." I smiled. At least now I could keep an eye on Maka…

* * *

_**Sometimes when I'm alone**_

_**I pretend that I'm a queen**_

_**It's almost believable**_

* * *

I felt my vision go blurry and my head started to throb. The world that surrounded me was painted red. The voices had finally gone and I was finding it hard to keep my eyes open.

"I love you guys…" I said as I was forced back into the memories of my life until finally I met darkness.

* * *

_**Even when I'm walking on a wire**_

_**Even when I set myself on fire**_

_**Why do I always feel invisible, invisible**_

_**Everyday I try to look my best**_

_**Even though inside I'm such a mess**_

_**Why do I always feel invisible, invisible**_

* * *

"Hey Maka we're home! We decided it would be cooler to hang out here with you instead." I called out. No reply.

"Maka!" I screamed hoping that maybe she just didn't hear me. Out of curiosity I walked into her bedroom hoping to see her asleep or reading a book but had not luck. I checked my room before heading over to the bathroom. "Maka I'm coming in." I told her.

"MAKA!" I cried only to be joined by the gang. "Kid call your father and Stein! Black Star call 911. Hey Maka, come on wake up."  
I cried and put my head in the crook of her neck as I held her. Blood was splattered up the walls, pills were littered throughout the small bathroom, and a note was in her hands. I kissed her bloody lips and Mika rubbed my back. Maka was gone.

* * *

Maka's Note:

_Dear anyone who is reading this,_

_You found me… sorry for such an ugly sight. There is only a few things I want to say as a my goodbye. Three things and three things only._

_I am sorry to all my friends thank you for trying to help me but I am leaving to become someone better. I am afraid we won't meet again for quite sometime._

_This is none of your guys fault. I have always been like this so please don't blame yourselves._

_I love you Soul Eater Evans thanks for being my partner and best friend_

_ Please reader share this note with Soul he should know who I am talking about when I say friends._

_Take care._

_Love,_

_Maka Albarn /3_


End file.
